Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
