Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
