so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
