So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
