well you can't waste a boner
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
porn star boner night. come get it.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize