Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize