Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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