well you can't waste a boner
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
