guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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