I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
