Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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