he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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