it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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