I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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