just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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