I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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