it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
