You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
