trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
