I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
