they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
