making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
