You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
