she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
