You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Randomize