clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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