Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
