why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
