He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
operation harelip BJ is a go
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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