i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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