i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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