Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
