I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I think I just sharted jello shots
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
