we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
