There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
