Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
