her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
