The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
