I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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