just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
