I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
this hospital has no fireball
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
