its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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