You work out of a Hotel?
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize
