did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
