Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize