Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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