Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
