I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
