yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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