Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You took a bar mat shot.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
