she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize